On Expectations and Reactions

Yashar Ali posses a good question to us all.  Does teaching children to be kind to women so as to not upset them cause more damage to the perception of females than it causes respect to women’s wishes?

My further question becomes, do women learn to react irrationally based on the expected reactions implied in comments such as, “She’ll bite my head off if I’m late”?  Based on my personal experience, the answer is, sadly, a resounding yes.

I do not remember to breathe like I should when I am faced with something that does not make me happy.  When I am upset, I tend to go for the throat; most of the time it is the figurative throat that is my target.  How can I show my dissatisfaction in a way that will cause the most pain and anguish?  How can I make them pity their choices?

I need to learn to be calm and handle these hiccups with grace.  I need to remember that a bit of tardiness is not the end of the world.  I need to remember life goes on from all things, including not getting the dinner I wanted.  As I am trying to teach my son this skill, I am getting better at, most definitely, but I also wonder how long I played the angry victim woman because society has found it appropriate to put me in that role based on my genitalia. 

So, treat me with love and respect because you love me, not because you fear me.  Then, perhaps I will be able to control the pieces of me that cause such terror-inducing phrases like “throw a fit,” “snap at you,” “unleash the fury,” and “steaming mad,” among others.


About SoManyHandles

30-something female, intent on living life.
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